“Sometimes, you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince.”
That’s kind of a cute saying, isn’t it? I think women like it because it permits us to still have hope for the Prince Charming at the end of a long story of nothing but dwarves, evil stepsisters, and dragons. “It will all be worth it in the end,” we tell ourselves.
But I think the emphasis in the saying should really be on the “sometimes”. Because let’s face it: we don’t have to kiss anyone.
There’s this horrible piece of advice floating around there that, in order to know whether or not you really are into someone, you have to kiss him or her. You’ll know the relationship is meant to be if, when you kiss them, you “feel something”, or “see fireworks”, or some other bizarre cliché that no one actually knows what it means.
It’s not that I think kissing is wrong, or that everyone should wait until they are married to kiss, I just think that this little kernel of relationship advice is cheapening the true beauty of a kiss. A kiss should be an expression of love and caring, not a device to answer the question of whether or not you love and care for someone.
In reality, if you’re not sure if someone is meant for you, kissing him or her isn’t going to clear anything up. It is just going to make things much more complicated. Why? Because contrary to what we may tell ourselves, it is possible to have feelings for someone who isn’t right for you. And a sure way to confuse those feelings even more is to get physically involved.
So I propose a shift in the way we think about kisses. I have never known anyone who regretted NOT kissing someone who is no longer in his or her life. I have, on the other hand, known a lot of girls (and guys) who do regret a kiss or two in their past. Let’s go back to a time when we believed in the true power and beauty of a kiss. And let’s stop wasting kisses on frogs.
- Health: A kiss is just a kiss? Depends (boston.com)