Question:
I’m a mom and cradle catholic who is wondering about how to school my kids. I see from your info on this blog that you attended public schools through high school. To what do you attribute your strong faith now? What people, practices of faith, challenges, shaped you into the person you are today? What would you do differently? You also seem to have a good balance with popular culture, not shunning it altogether yet being discerning in your choices. This is an important skill to learn, because we’re social by nature and it is hard to share Christ if you’re too sheltered. Any thoughts on this aspect of being a good Catholic?
Answer:
Good question. I will warn you…the short version of my answer to the homeschool vs. public school vs. private school question is simply: “I don’t know.” It is something I go back-and-forth on all of the time, to be honest. I will try to answer your questions about my specific background and we will see if that is helpful to either of us 
Hands down, I attribute my faith to my family more than any other influence, and specifically to my parents (and of course it goes without saying that I was given such an amazing and faithful family by the grace of God). Yes, I went to public school and no, we didn’t always get a family rosary in or memorize the Baltimore Catechism, but I never once questioned my parents’ love for Christ and His Church. Religion wasn’t a game; and God was real. Conviction like that demands your attention no matter how it is expressed.
For my family, it was expressed by living out the faith no matter what situation we were in. If my sister and I had a cheerleading competition that happened to fall on Sunday, we may have had to skip out a little early and miss the awards ceremony because mass came first. One year, we hosted an “All Hallows’ Eve” party at our house, which included listening to a portion of the Screwtape Letters on tape. If we happened to have school on Good Friday, we would be taken out a little before noon to spend the afternoon either at service or in silence.
It wasn’t always easy; but I don’t think any path ever is. Homeschoolers sometimes talk about feeling like they were missing out in high school when I often found myself feeling like I didn’t fit in entirely (there aren’t a whole lot of teenagers who are serious about taking their faith seriously). Fortunately for me, that classic “rebellion against authority” phase that teenagers are often prone to often found its expression in taking pride in the fact that being a devout Catholic isn’t exactly “mainstream”.
And my parish youth group helped. Actually, my youth group helped a lot. And so did the fact that my parish had a blessed sacrament chapel open 24/7 to those who knew the door code…not that my parents ever let me go by myself past 6pm, but that chapel meant everything to me in high school.
Bottom line: I don’t think my parents laid out a battle plan the day my oldest brother was born and had it all figured out. I think they followed God’s will to the best of their abilities and, for us, that ended up meaning living very much in the world, but always doing our best not to be of it.
All of that being said— I spent the past three years of my life in college getting to know some of the best people I have ever met. Being at a small Catholic university, a good amount of them had been homeschooled. And I’m not afraid to admit: there is a lot to love about homeschooling.
First of all: these people knew more about the faith when they were twelve than I knew going into my freshman year of college (and I was no dummy!). Of course, that doesn’t necessarily mean they loved God more than I did—but they knew a lot more about Him and therefore were able to love more about Him than I could. Maybe I wouldn’t have appreciated it as much when I was nine…but who knows?
Secondly: as a public schooler, talking to a homeschooler about the books I have read (or, um, haven’t read) can just be embarrassing (a lot of smiling and nodding along happens). Of course, there are exceptions: homeschoolers who hate reading and public schoolers who read everything. But by and large, homeschoolers have read the classics by age 10 and public schoolers can graduate high school with an eighth grade reading level.
When it comes down to it, there are pros and cons to everything. If you choose to homeschool, your kids will miss out on certain things, but the same will be true if you choose to put them in public school. There is no objectively right or wrong way here; it is just what works best for you and your family (and ultimately, what will help get your children to Heaven…because, as far as I can tell, that is why God gives people children in the first place).
So, that’s my take. Any homeschoolers out there want to share their perspective?
I’ve been homeschooled (for the majority), attended public school, went to a homeschool cooperative, and attended a private Catholic boarding school. My favorite was…college.
No, really, I think homeschooling was probably the one that worked best for me. But one thing that I’ve realized is that every child has a different learning style. I have one brother that was homeschooled K-12 and is now going on to med school. Obviously, he did fine. Some of my other brothers, however, did not do well homeschooling and are now really thriving at the public school (sports was a HUGE motivating factor for them). I, however, HATED going to public school. In my experience, the more self-motivated you are in homeschooling the better experience you will have (but that could just be me). There are a lot of different options today: homeschooling with an advisory teaching service, going to public school part-time (some districts allow this and some don’t). Some homeschooling programs are also a lot better than others. It’s not an east issue by any means, and I think this is one thing that every parent has to decide for their child individually. Regardless of what educational method you choose, nothing will be perfect, and a strong core of faith and family can carry one through any of these options. The family is really what forms a person, I think, and the things learned and taught in that sphere can never be replicated elsewhere. Obviously, this is a topic I could talk all day about. Both my parents are educators and have worked in a variety of systems so we have a lot of discussions about this sort of thing at home. Oh, and one more thing: especially for kids, the grass is usually greener on the other side of the fence. 
That doesn’t mean it will necessarily be better, though…
Hi!
I’m a Catholic convert, home schooled-for-most-of-my-life, young woman who is one of eight children. I’ve had the opportunity to experience both home schooling and school-schooling, and I’ve found that I’ve always chosen to return to home schooling. Not because it is inherently better than being in a real school, but because it was a better fit for me. I know there is not one specific answer to this often frustrating question, but here is why I generally liked home schooling better.
1) You get to go to school in your pajamas…who doesn’t love that?
2) It gave me the freedom to learn about what I wanted, and also to pursue extra-curricular activities like horse-back riding, choir, etc.
3) For me, home schooling allowed me to utilize my imagination more completely, whereas in school-schooling, I was spoon-fed information and it limited my ability to be creative and learn the way I wanted to learn.
4) For high school, I went a home school co-op where I attended all of my classes, received all my assignments, and had some semblance of being in a normal, friend-filled school environment. The three days/week set up still allowed time for extracurricular activities, but I also feel that it prepared me better for college because it relied heavily on independent study. As the student, you were responsible for completing assignments on time without the five days/week set up to rely on.
5) With the co-op that I attended, you were able to mix and match classes with your ability level. It offered both normal and AP classes, a variety of language classes (Latin was required for Freshmen), and also an array of electives like choir, art, and speech and debate.
My siblings and I are naturally smart, but we all have our fortes. Being in a school environment like the co-op allowed us to fill graduation requirements while also studying things that we enjoy.
6) The co-op wasn’t Catholic, but it had a very strong focus on Christianity. This aspect encouraged me to learn more about what I believe and ways to explain it, as I was often confronted about my Catholicism. This helped me to grow in my faith in immense ways, and I was so sure about my decision when I became confirmed during my Sophomore year of high school. Additionally, being at home with my parents gave me the option to be fully immersed in my faith and I learned so much more this way. My mom has always been my role-model in many ways, but seeing her live out her faith on a day to day basis was an extremely valuable opportunity.
Overall, it comes down to what you think is right for your family and your circumstances. If you can, try and find a home school co-op that has been established near where you live. This combined the aspects of home schooling that I loved so much with the school environment that some kids tend to miss out on with purely at-home home schooling.
Home schooling was the best fit for me, but it may not be for other children. My mom, once we were old enough to decide, allowed us to choose which way we wanted to be educated. My brothers decided to go the public-school route and they loved it. I chose to home school, and even though it was frustrating at times, it was the most fulfilling, enjoyable option for me. I hope that helps! My prayers are with you!Margaret
I am going to chime in, on the public vs private. I agree 100 percent it depends on the child, family and circumstances. I moved to America from Russia at age 12 after being adopted. I attended public school for grades 7, 8, 9 and part of 10th. I was not raised in a christian home in Russia but was introduced to Jesus thru the orphange from age 9 to 12 thru the Orthadox church. When I came to America and public schools I quickely found out what a condom was because there was one on the middle school campus ground. I was still though able to keep some innnocence and my parents were able to start what is now the foundation of my faith with in the Catholic Church. As I entered High School it became a whole new world and my peers changed dramaticly. That is when I was labeled the “good girl” like it was a bad thing and “religious girl.” People (christians and even Catholics I went to church with were suddenly not only sexual (at least from how they talked) but I couldn’t go a day with out being thrown in my face. By my sophmore year my peers which had been church going kids joked about bisexuality and some even claimed to be. Just by hanging around these kids I became numb to what was going on around me. I wasnt participating in any of it or even joking about it but it all lost its shock value and was becoming acceptable to me. Worst part was I was completely unaware it was happening. I was teased because of the music I listened to (didnt have curse words or sexual contect). Eventually my mother felt the Holy Spirit warning her I was in trouble. I didn’t know it at the time but she told my dad that she needed to take me out of public school. When dad asked why she said I dont know specifics but I believe she is in trouble, like spiritual warfare. THen mom laid down with me one afternoon, plugged in a movie and and just had a mother daughter talk. Asking me how school was, how I was feeling, who was I hanging out with, what activites were they in and she just sat and listened. I was happy with my school and I was happy with the friends I had there. With in a few days she took me out of public school with no knowledge of how she was going to educate me (home school vs private). After researching for a month every Catholic school with in 50 miles (there were non close by) she found that the diocese high school stated they had some kids that were expermenting sexually and out of the closet as well and basically I would be exposed to the same things as i was a public high school. Finally my mom found a school 40 miles from our home that was a San Diego non docian Catholic school. It was kthru 12. They taught latin, said the rosary every day and prayed at the start of each day, before lunch, before each class and at the end of each day. We went to Mass every Friday and once a month that mass was in Latin. A preist would come monthly to hear confessions. They had a no public display of affection ruleon campus and a stric dress code. When I was at public school kids always gasped that we had 4 children in our family. At this school when asked how many kids I always stated with “just” 4 (that was a small family at the school). I was finally amoung peers that there didnt need to be shame for my familiy rules because they had similiar rules as well. The kids were/are all really “good kids.” Meaning they dont drink, smoke, do drugs or experiment with sex. If you dated a classmate, the most anyone would notice is because the boy opened the door for you, held your books or maybe if you lived dangerously you attempted to hold hands under the lunch table. I didn’t realize at the time while I was at public school, I really needed a place
sorry so long 
of innocence. a safe place where I could grow in my Catholic faith and relationship with Christ. A place were there was no competetion of image/clothes. Where my parents wouldn’t be torn down because of the rules they had. Where I wasnt encouraged to lie. Ridiculed because I was a christian ( it is very popular to say you are agnostic or atheist or pagean
in high school). THis private school was the right school for me. My parents lived check to check and couldnt afford it but they prayed and had faith God would provide. Mom mad the sacrafice to drive me 40 miles round trip each day to school. She actually drove 160 miles every day as she had to go back to our home city to pick up my younger siblings at their schools each day). God provided for my parents both thru financial raises and scholorships thru the school. By my junior year my mom enrolled my 2 younger sisters. This past June I graduated from high school and now attend a cal state (dont even ask how thats going as it started with freshman orientation informing where i can get free condoms but not telling me where the library is).
So with all that being said, my first 9 years, was one of alcoholism, drug abuse and sex outside of marriage. I did not have the foundation most Catholic kids have going into high school. Thankfully my parents prayed and listen to God’s nudge on how to educate me. I truely believe God will do the same for any parent. If you feel God calling you to homeschool then homeschool, If you feel God calling you to educate your children in public school then thats ok too
One thing that’s very important for home-schooling is to make sure that the children learn social skills, too. My local community has soccer every weekend, a musical every winter, ultimate frisbee, monthly Mass, and combining families for certain classes. On the other hand, my cousins only learn one day a week. I think it just depends on the available resources in the area!
This is some great information for our youth parents. Will there be more post on information like this one?
http://www.youthworker.com/youth-ministry-resources-ideas/youth-ministry/11624697/